


Nervous Is an Understatement

by Patchwork drabbles (PurplePatchwork)



Series: RusAme Drabbles [68]
Category: Hetalia: Axis Powers
Genre: Alternate Universe - Human, First Time, M/M, Nervousness
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-01-29
Updated: 2018-01-29
Packaged: 2019-03-11 02:25:12
Rating: Mature
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,433
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/13514769
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/PurplePatchwork/pseuds/Patchwork%20drabbles
Summary: Alfred would never have imagined he could be this nervous. It's only sex they're talking about.





	Nervous Is an Understatement

Alfred flipped on the light switch, illuminating the reddened reflection of his face. Leaning closer to the mirror, the boy found that he could easily count every soft freckle, gaze falling upon the quiver in his lips and the being unmistakeably drawn to the flushed spot in his neck. Alfred shuddered as his mind wandered back to Ivan’s lips, tongue and teeth, nipping, licking, massaging Alfred’s skin until it was too sensitive to bear further touch. And now Ivan was here, in the next room, lying on Alfred’s bed, waiting for his return. Possibly already naked.

Alfred rubbed his hands together, trying to ease his breathing as he paced up and down the confined space of his bathroom. It was all right. He was all right. Nothing to be nervous about. It was just sex. Plenty of people his age had already undergone this experience. It wouldn’t kill him to try his hand at it.

Alfred glanced back at the door, heart still beating so fast it felt like it was planning on leaping from his chest. It wasn’t the first time they had ever done something considerably sexy. The shy kisses had long ago evolved into heavy make-out sessions. He knew all about _that_. How to derive pleasure from using your tongue instead of solely your lips, how to best sneak your hands under the shirt of your unassuming boyfriend, how to get a sneak peek at said boyfriend changing into a different t-shirt, marvelling at the pale marble that was his torso, the light-coloured chest hair, the sturdiness of it all. Oh, Alfred had seen it, had wanted it. Only, now that it was time to finally get what he asked for, he found his gut constricting unpleasantly, his body constantly shaking.

Alfred stopped in front of the mirror once again, gripped the sink tightly with both hands. “Come on, Jones,” he softly berated himself. “It’s _Ivan_ we’re talking about. He’s not gonna hurt you, or laugh at you, or anything. What are you afraid of?” The fact that Ivan was here clearly meant he wanted Alfred just as bad as Alfred wanted him, that he wanted _Alfred_ to be the only one he could share this new experience with. And Alfred wanted that too, he really did. Only, his current bravery seemed to have been momentarily misplaced.

Alfred took a deep breath, closed his eyes. _Okay. You can do this_. He had everything they needed. Lube, condoms, towels to place on the bed so that his covers wouldn’t get dirty, even some nice music and candlelight to set the mood. Not that it wouldn’t look strange if he tried to set the mood now; after all, Ivan was already waiting for his to emerge from the bathroom, preferably shirtless, pants-less was an option.

Alfred dragged a hand through his hair, placed his fingers thoughtfully at his glasses. Right. He had forgotten about those. Surely it wouldn’t be sexy if he came in without them and consequently broke his neck on the edge of the bed because he was blind as a mole without them. Leave them on. Or don’t leave them on, because surely he’d be sexier without glasses; Ivan had told him he liked the blue of Alfred’s eyes when they weren’t bespectacled. Blindness or sexiness, which one to choose…

And then there was the question of clothes. He couldn’t waltz back in without having undressed, or at least partially so. Ivan had made his own intentions perfectly clear; he’d get a head’s start while Alfred went to clean up in here. If Alfred didn’t take at least one thing off, it wouldn’t be fair to his partner.

Alfred squeezed his eyes shut and yanked his shirt over his head, softly cursing when they caught on his spectacles, before unceremoniously dropping the garment on the bathroom floor. Alfred had never particularly liked his body. He used to be a lot chubbier when he was still in his young teens, but lately he’d joined the gym and had made regular exercise part of his weekly routine. He still thought there was a lot about him that could be improved, but at least Ivan had never shown even an inkling of disinterest when it came to Alfred’s body. Still, he carefully averted his gaze from the mirror to once more focus on the door.

He couldn’t hear any movement coming from the other side. Ivan couldn’t have left, could he? A sudden panic pinched at Alfred’s throat, hot and hard. In two swift steps he was at the door, in another heartbeat he had flung it open.

Ivan looked up at the sudden movement, still lying on top of Alfred’s bed, seemingly trying to find something for his hands to do (he was constantly moving them about). Ivan was equally as shirtless as Alfred, the button of his pants opened, revealing a desire for Alfred to hurry up already.

“Ready?” Ivan asked, voice laden with excitement, eyes approvingly roving Alfred’s uncovered chest.

Alfred’s mouth opened and closed, no sound coming out. This was it. This was really happening. They were really going to…

“A-almost!” he squawked, suddenly overly anxious to get back in there and lock the door behind him, create a little panic room. Or perhaps a bomb shelter would be a bigger help right now.

Ivan pushed himself up on his elbows, one eyebrow quirked. “Is everything all right?”

Alfred’s head robotically bobbed up and down. “Uh-huh!” he laughed, high-pitched voice unfamiliar to his own ears. “Of course I’m all right! Why wouldn’t I be all right? Is there any reason for me not to be all right?”

He continued babbling as Ivan slowly rose, a look of understanding settling in his round features—youthful, yet betraying his first meeting with adulthood in the light shadow on his chin and jawline, the refined brow ready to contain adult wisdom. Slowly, carefully, as if sneaking up on unsuspecting prey, Ivan stalked closer, until he was standing right on front of his rambling boyfriend, listening to that rant coming to a hackling stop.

“Alfred,” Ivan said gently, placing his hands on each of Alfred’s shoulders. Alfred shivered at the touch, but Ivan doubted it had anything to do with him being cold. “Are you nervous?”

“Nervous? Who, me?” Alfred laughed, eyes wildly shooting left and right, unable to lock with Ivan’s, until he finally hung his head. “I mean…yeah. A little. A little a lot. As in, nervous is an understatement.” Another little laugh. Pathetic.

Ivan leant forward, pressed a lingering kiss to Alfred’s temple. Alfred blinked, as if in a daze, slowly lifting his gaze from his feet to the gorgeous presence right before him.

“I am too,” Ivan admitted, quickly continuing when seeing Alfred’s visible shock. “This is my first time too, remember? I do not have any experience with this…this desire. I want _you_ , more than I have ever wanted anything else.”

Alfred was biting his lower lip. Had he really no idea of how enticing that small gesture made him look in Ivan’s eyes? Ivan kissed Alfred again, on his jawline, right above where he’d placed a hickey earlier. He could feel Alfred starting to relax, lightly leaning in to him. How wonderful it felt to have a body reacting to your own, as if you were really made to fit, made to be together. Like a key in a lock.

“There is nothing to be afraid of. We do not have to go ‘all the way’ tonight, if that stresses you out too much. I just want to be with you. Touch you. Know how it is to pleasure you.” This last part was boldly whispered into Alfred’s ear, and Ivan knew the effect he had on his partner by how red this part of his body currently looked. His tongue briefly shot out, as if he had no control over the muscle, touching to that delicately soft lobe. Alfred turned his head, blue eyes burning behind his glasses, mirroring Ivan’s passion.

“You’re doing this on purpose,” Alfred growled, seeming more eager already.

Ivan smiled. “And tell me. Is it working?”

Alfred allowed a flash of a smirk before leaning up, hungrily covering Ivan’s mouth with his own.

Oh yes, to apply the word “nervous” to Alfred’s current state of being was still a huge understatement. But somehow, Alfred found it to be almost bearable when he surrendered to the sheer ecstasy of feeling Ivan’s lean body bend and curve under his touch, when Ivan did his very best to make Alfred see stars.


End file.
